1 post tagged “childbirth”
What is it about a woman being in labor that everyone feels the need to flock to the hospital and get a front row seat? I realize the imminent cute baby (that honestly won't be cute for a few more weeks) is exciting. But that is all anyone ever thinks about. God forbid you should think about the poor mother whose body is revolting against her trying to force this small being that has tortured her insides for the last 9 months out. Why the rant you ask? Am I pregnant? No. My favorite phrase when someone asks me if my husband and I are going to bring anymore tax deductions into this world is "Not only has that ship sailed. It's been sunk. Forever.".
Again, so why the rant. My ex-husbands sister-in-law is currently in the process of bringing forth her first child. And yes I will agree that this is a momentous occasion. But really, when you are in labor you do not need an audience. No one is going to fall over dead if they don't get to see the baby while it is still covered in womb goo (as I lovingly call it).
Not only are you being poked and prodded by every stranger employed by your hospital of choice (when I was born the lady in the room next door had her baby delivered by the janitor. ew.). Every family member within a 50 mile radius of the hospital feels an obligation to be there, whether you have met them or not. Being poked and prodded, very uncomfortable and wearing a gown that displays your derrier like a fashion display on 5th Avenue, you aren't exactly in the mood to entertain. Tea and crumpets anyone?
On this note, I will recount bit and pieces of my first child's birth. Or the aftermath at least. I will spare you the details of the horrid nurses and what not. (Note this was before they monitored every person coming in and out of the maternity ward. And had the forethought to ask you if you wanted to allow people to visit you) After my daughter was born(3 am on the dot), her dad and his parents arrive about 2 hours later. Ooohs and ahhs all around even though her head was more pointed than those creatures on Star Trek or whatever that space show was. As beautiful as my daughter is now, she was not a cute newborn. That evening as I am still in the hospital of hell with all the joys of post-partum nurses and the overhead buzz every 2 hours of "nurse the baby!!" while trying to sleep. My daughters father's family visits again. Only this time, it is her father (1), his brother (2), his brother's girlfriend(3), his parents (4 and 5), his aunt (6) his aunts son (7), my parents (8 and 9), my grandparents (10 and 11). All those people including me and my daughter add up to 13 people in my hospital room. I cannot vent enough about how inappropriate it was for his brother to bring his girlfriend (whom I had met only once). And his aunt (who showed up without calling first) that brought her son (who I had never met before).
Everyone is passing the baby around with no thought to the fact that, hello, I have had this tiny person inside of me for 9 months where no one could take her away and they are passing her around as if I should have no cares in the world about it. Then the nurse comes in (why do they do that when you have visitors?) and wants to do her "check". So what does everyone do? THEY TAKE THE BABY OUTSIDE!!! Where I cannot see her at all! And are so engrossed in their conversation they don't notice the nurse leave. So here I am, panicking because no one is coming back in with MY baby.
I was so glad when I got to go home. I was very thankful for the lock on the front door and caller ID. But alas, here I am running a fever, new baby, everything hurts and I am on-call for the next 18 years with a newborn, and someone knocks on my door. Big kudos to my friend that lived upstairs from me, who in her thoughtfullness told a friend of ours that I hadn't seen since high school, that I had come home with my baby and she should come visit me. What are people thinking?!!
I will say that I did learn a lesson from all this. When I was pregnant with my second child I laid down some laws, lol. #1, do not call anyone but our parents till we are home from the hospital, and tell them they are not to call anyone till we are home from the hospital. (Note: My mother in law could not control herself on this and his cousin, who again I had met 1 time, just had to come for a visit).
I will end my ranting now. I am sure you are tired of hearing it. I think we may have to go look at cars for my husband today. Doesn't that sound exciting?
